I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
