Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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