i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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