i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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