btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
