Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Is Oprah even human
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
