do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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