Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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