I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize