I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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