lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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