A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
