I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize