mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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