Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
