i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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