Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
