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• (330): View more from Ohio

  cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!

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• (954): View more from Florida

  i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.

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• 

  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Too many margaritas?

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.

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• 

  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (502): View more from Kentucky

  I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.

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• (774): View more from Massachusetts

  did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?

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• (543): View more from

  So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?

  (256): View more from Alabama

  Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.

  (543): View more from

  You are an idiot.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.

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• (520): View more from Arizona

  I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.

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