you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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