I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
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Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
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We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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