did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
