Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
