She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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