What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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