3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Randomize
