drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
