Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Randomize
