just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
He called his prostate his "boner button".
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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