So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
