Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
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