Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
