let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Boobs speak an international language.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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