Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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