remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
