i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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