YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
