it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I think your dad took our porno
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
