Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize
