Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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