It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
