ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
