I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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