I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
