Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
