I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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