Sry I called you an 8
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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