Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize