Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Randomize
