He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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