i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
