Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
