So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
