yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
We are all done wearing pants today
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
